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strathspey@strathspey.org:45336

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  • Ron Mackey

    Ron Mackey May 21, 2006, 1:26 a.m. (Message 45336)

    (Fwd) this is supposed to be educational!!

    I came across this and thought it might draw someSCD comments 
    or amendments.  Apart from music its rather quiet tonight.
    
     
    ------- Forwarded message follows -------
    
    
    Document -
    
     'What men want' 
     -- JUST to help clear up a few things....
    
    THE RULES.................................
    We always hear "the rules" from the female side.  Now here are the rules 
    from the male side.  These are our rules:-
    
    Please note these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
    
    1. Breasts are for looking at and that is why we do it.  Don't ry to change 
    that.
    
    1. Learn to work the toilet seat.  You're a big girl.  If it's up, put it 
    down.  We need it up, you need it down.  You don't hear us complaining about 
    you leaving it down.
    
    1 Saturday = sports.  It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. 
    Let it be.
    
    1. Shopping is NOT a sport.  And no, we are never going to think of it that 
    way.
    
    1. Crying is blackmail.
    
    1. Ask for what you want.  Let us be clear on this one:  Subtle hints do not 
    work!  Strong hints do not work!  Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
    
    1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
    
    1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.  That's what 
    we do.  Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
    
    1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
    
    1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.In fact, all 
    comments become null and void after 7 days.
    
    1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.  Don't ask us.
    
    1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways 
    makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
    
    1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. 
    Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
    
    1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during 
    commercials.
    
    1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
    
    1. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach,for 
    example, is a fruit, not a colour.  Lilac is a flower.   We have no idea 
    what mauve is.
    
    1. If it itches, it will be scratched.  We do that.
    
    1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's 
    wrong.  We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
    
    1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you 
    don't want to hear.
    
    1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. 
    Really.
    
    1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss 
    such topics as Sex, Sport, or Cars.
    
    1. You have enough clothes.
    
    1. You have too many shoes.
    
    1. I am in shape.  Round is a shape.
    
    1. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the settee 
    tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping.
    
    Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
    Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them an education!!
    
    Happy New Year!!
    
    _________________________________________________________________
    The new MSN Search Toolbar now includes Desktop search! 
    http://toolbar.msn.co.uk/
    
    ------- End of forwarded message -------
          

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