Cues

Dianna Shipman

Message 19160 · 30 Oct 1999 09:16:22 · Fixed-width font · Whole thread

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Some dances seem to elicit the response of everyone trying to help more than
others - the dances that are tough to recover from where the whole set wants
to keep dancing and know it's about to crash -- also the degree of
"franticness" displayed by the person seeking help.

If I have any doubt about how any cue I've given was received I try right
after the dance to have a quiet word with the person and check out how it
was received - usually most gratefully - and when not, I make a mental note
with that person not to offer in future. The times when I'm more likely to
give "bad advice" is in a dance that has two figures that start the same way
and I'm in the couple who's standing out and the lost person looks at me
frantically for a cue (usually one of the people in the group I lead) - and
I think that they're in one point in the dance when it's the other.

I encourage newer dancers not to worry so much about messing up - we all
do - we haven't shot anyone for it - the sun'll still come up in the
morning - it's only 5-8 minutes out of your life so how bad can it be - I do
tell them ahead of time which ones on a ball program will be very difficult
for them AND (thanks to a suggestion from Richard Walker) for the last ball
emailed them all a list of which dances a strong partner could get them
through and which a strong partner could not (no matter what they say). It
seems to have worked - they were on the dance floor for most of the dances
and seemed able to smile and keep moving and having a good time regardless.

We have a couple of particularly skilled dancers that when they mess up then
try to see how long they can keep improvising until they figure out where
they're supposed to be (or what dance they're doing) - very comical at
times - dancers who have danced a LONG time seem more likely (especially if
they've had a tough day and the mind is wandering) to be trying to do the
wrong dance - we just have a lot of fun with it.
Dianna
Dianna L. Shipman
xxxxxxxxxxxxx@xxxxxxxx.xxx.xxx
Dianna L. Shipman, P.C., Attorney at Law
PMB 134, 1436 W. Gray
Houston, TX 77019-4946
web page: http://home.att.net/~diannashipman
phone: 713-522-1212
----- Original Message -----
From: Norah Link <xxxxx@xxx.xx>
To: <xxxxxxxxxx@xx.xxxxxxxxxx.xxx-xxxxxxxxx.xx>
Sent: Friday, October 29, 1999 11:14 AM
Subject: RE: Cues

>
>
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From: Priscilla M. Burrage
> > Sent: October 29, 1999 10:27 AM
> >
> > When I'm giving advice,
> > do I really
> > know how it's being perceived? When I'm receiving advice, do
> > I stop to
> > analyze why it bugs me so much?
> >
> >
>
> And maybe that's the point of the exercise Bruce has set for us. We may
> tend to give cues the way we would like to receive them. Or maybe we
don't
> and should think about how we would like to receive them more. And it may
> be helpful to hear how others like to receive cues - presumably to see
that
> we can expand our repertoire both of giving and receiving cues.
>
> One thing - when an entire set starts yelling at someone to go this way or
> do that, it may not in fact be helpful, but I think we can at least say
that
> those in the set are genuine in their DESIRE to be helpful. It takes
> someone with a cool head to recognize that the effect is the opposite and
> shut up. Doesn't mean they can't give a few of those non-verbal cues,
> though.
>
> cheers,
> Norah
>
> --
> Norah Link <xxxxx@xxx.xx>
>

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